ST Alpha - "would anyone like to know my friendship dilemma overshare? i think i can handle what comes at me. -- nm" (Reading a Post)

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would anyone like to know my friendship dilemma overshare? i think i can handle what comes at me. -- nm

Posted by kare (aka kare) Jan 5 '09, 10:20

(No message)

Responses:

Absolutely! -- nm - TaurusII Jan 5, 10:23
of course we do. -- nm - El Fandie Jan 5, 10:23
YOUR A HORRIBLE PERSON!!! -- nm - nubby Jan 5, 10:22 2
- Wait for it..... -- nm - TaurusII Jan 5, 10:23 1
  - *laughing* YOUR FRIEND IS A F*CKING MORON! -- nm - Loyola Jan 5, 10:24
Bring it! I promise not to call your friend(s) names. -- nm - Dr.Vermin Jan 5, 10:21 1
- heh. go for it. (i'm pissed.) - kare Jan 5, 10:32
yes please. -- nm - loosilu Jan 5, 10:21 26
- ok! so, i'll leave the details out. but basically, i spent the weekend with some friends and am kind of up in the air about what to do about one - kare Jan 5, 10:31 25
  - Confession: I tend to be the same way emotionally (thinking stuff is about me). I sympathize with your friend, but she needs to grow up - con_carne Jan 5, 10:43 1
    - interesting perspective, thanks. :) -- nm - kare Jan 5, 10:44
  - Yeah, uncool. But sympathetically so. - Dr.Vermin Jan 5, 10:36
  - thing is that if she always makes everything about herself, you'll never be happy with her friendship. talking about this will not change the dynamic - zork Jan 5, 10:36 4
    - disagree, sometimes making the person aware of such things is all it takes. -- nm - loosilu Jan 5, 10:38 3
      - we've gone back and forth before. but i am thinking that even if i completely end the friendship, i can at leas do her the (potential) favor of laying - kare Jan 5, 10:41 1
        
        If you've been back and forth, then I think this is a good idea (and you would be doing her a favor in the long run). -- nm - loosilu Jan 5, 10:43
      - perhaps. i think it unlikely to last but maybe. -- nm - zork Jan 5, 10:39
  - Wow I was right the first time. -- nm - Loyola Jan 5, 10:36
  - You never know...she may not even realize she's doing it. I'd just bring it up with a - Jim Jan 5, 10:35 10
    - she actually does. she confessed to another friend there that she's doing it because she's jealous. but it's like she can't help herself. - kare Jan 5, 10:38 8
      - Ouch. Well that changes the style of the conversation. You could always play the - Jim Jan 5, 10:41 1
        
        it kind of *is* being mean, isn't it? i'm sort of excusing it because of the reasoning behind it, if that makes sense. -- nm - kare Jan 5, 10:44
      - Reading this, I up the likelihood I do what I posted below by at least 20% into the 80-90% range. -- nm - TFox Jan 5, 10:41
      - ahhhhh. then in that case I would just back off in a passive way. -- nm - loosilu Jan 5, 10:39 4
        
        i'm doing that with the *other* friend who pissed me off in a similar way. but that's because we work together. -- nm - kare Jan 5, 10:40 3
        
        you think you need to address this one more directly? -- nm - loosilu Jan 5, 10:40 2
        
        i can't afford to end this other friendship with the coworker, but i'm actively backing off. - kare Jan 5, 10:48 1
        
        (can't afford to end it from a work perspective) -- nm - kare Jan 5, 10:49
    - Unless of course, SHE was the chick you kissed before him on New Year's...then you could just be sending mixed signals! nm - Jim Jan 5, 10:35
  - My advice is never of use to you on stuff like this, I think, b/c I'd be meaner than you'd ever want to be. -- nm - TFox Jan 5, 10:34 3
    - i do care about her, so i don't want to just tell her to eff off and be done with her. but i also just want to tell her to eff off and be done with - kare Jan 5, 10:36 2
      - If it is of any use, I would likely start off being polite, wait until she balked or copped an attitude... - TFox Jan 5, 10:39 1
        
        heh. -- nm - kare Jan 5, 10:42
  - ahhhh. while I totally sympathize, she is being uncool. - loosilu Jan 5, 10:33

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