ST Alpha - "my workfriend lisa is on a jesus cruise right now. no drinking, no swearing, no sex, no smoking for seven days. seven days." (Reading a Post)

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my workfriend lisa is on a jesus cruise right now. no drinking, no swearing, no sex, no smoking for seven days. seven days.

Posted by amanda (aka amanda) Dec 2 '11, 12:40

1) how long would you last?
2) what if I told you that you could cruise jamaica and key west for a week for $199 if you signed up not to drink, swear, or smoke for a week. could you do it? would it be worth it to you?

Responses:

No drinking, sure. No swearing, possibly. No smoking, it'd sure help me re-quit. No sex... well, I already have that problem. -- nm - Qale Dec 2, 13:01
I could do it, but it would not be pretty in the parking lot when I got off the boat -- nm - Epiphany Dec 2, 12:55
is a vacation really a vacation if you can't have any fun? I'd be kicked off the boat before they had my bags on board -- nm - dogbert Dec 2, 12:55 3
- think big: hijack the boat. -- nm - Beryllium Dec 2, 12:56 1
  - "We're going to the happiest place on Earth! ...Tijuana!" -- nm - Dr.Vermin Dec 2, 12:58
- I would wear a Humping For Jesus T-shirt and see what happened. -- nm - Spawn Dec 2, 12:56
but if you're married, you're *required* to have sex! -- nm - colin Dec 2, 12:54 10
- without birth control -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 12:55 9
  - And only in the missionary position. -- nm - Qale Dec 2, 13:03 1
    - and the woman cannot enjoy it. -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 13:04
  - ewwwww -- nm - Epiphany Dec 2, 12:56 6
    - Stupid sexy bible. -- nm - Spawn Dec 2, 12:57 1
      - [deleted]
    - eww? -- nm - colin Dec 2, 12:56 1
      - I don't want " let's make a baby" to be on my mind at that moment - Epiphany Dec 2, 13:11
    - they have inspectors! -- nm - Beryllium Dec 2, 12:56 1
      - "you didn't spill your seed on the ground, did you??" -- nm - colin Dec 2, 12:57
Sure, no problem. - JaxSean Dec 2, 12:50
If I could get off the boat, sure. If not, no. -- nm - the liioulu with Dec 2, 12:47
I make up my own swears so I'm cool. -- nm - TFox Dec 2, 12:46
Forget it. -- nm - loosilu Dec 2, 12:45
Jamaica? No smoking... anything? - Dr.Vermin Dec 2, 12:45
*slaps down money* I'M OUT!!! -- nm - Spawn Dec 2, 12:45
i can get off the boat at all the ports of call, right? i could do it. -- nm - Andie Dec 2, 12:44 4
- there's just two of these. but yes, you can. you're supposed to go on organized tours at the stops. - amanda Dec 2, 12:46 3
  - Organized trip's are the dealbreakers. - the liioulu with Dec 2, 12:51
  - This deal just keeps getting worse. - Spawn Dec 2, 12:47 1
    - I have altered the deal so that you can only wear sunscreen that's applied directly by Creepy Steve. - Darth Cruisedirector Dec 2, 12:57
[deleted] 9
- I don't drink or smoke, so I'm not missing much. I might look into it. -- nm - spamlet Dec 2, 12:57
- [deleted]
- see I could do without the booze, cursing and sex, but to have to be around the type of people who would go on a Jesus cruise for 7 days? dealbreaker -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 12:48 5
  - old traveling salesmen tip: best place to hook up is church social stuff (doesn't apply to locals, the other locals know you - zeitgeist Dec 2, 12:56 1
    - [deleted]
  - [deleted]
  - we can still use sarcasm and mockery though right? -- nm - Beaker Dec 2, 12:49 1
    - sure, but I think that would get kind of old after day 2. -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 12:50
- see, for me, there's zero upside. -- nm - loosilu Dec 2, 12:47
the swearing would be my only issue -- nm - tRuMaN Dec 2, 12:43
swearing would be toughes t for me but I'd have a bigger problem with "on a boat for 7 days" part. -- nm - Reagen Dec 2, 12:42
They'd literally have to drag me on kicking and screaming like Charlton Heston in the original Planet of the Apes. -- nm - Mel Profit Dec 2, 12:42 5
- Dude, I do'nt even like boats. fuck that. -- nm - loosilu Dec 2, 12:49
- this was pretty much my thought. they search your luggage for booze on the way in. -- nm - amanda Dec 2, 12:48 3
  - "why do you have yeast and potatoes in your bag?" -- nm - Reagen Dec 2, 12:49 1
    - (I just burst out laughing at my desk.) -- nm - amanda Dec 2, 12:50
  - [deleted]
is #2 all you have to do? any soul saving?? -- nm - jingle pixie Dec 2, 12:42 6
- lisa says you can skip prayer and get hotter breakfast while everyone prays. one bonus of being a heathen. -- nm - amanda Dec 2, 12:45 5
  - [deleted] 4
    - Keelhauling for Jesus! -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 12:53 2
      - heh. Had not seen your t-shirt when I posted mine. -- nm - Spawn Dec 2, 12:59
      - If you were really Jesusy, you could walk on water. -- nm - loosilu Dec 2, 12:54
    - Are you a good swimmer? -- nm - Spawn Dec 2, 12:52
I couldn't do it. I've been reprimanded twice for swearing in front of customers and I am *super* careful about it. I'm gone day two, easily. -- nm - amanda Dec 2, 12:41 2
- [deleted] 1
  - Bill Bennett says yes. -- nm - Reagen Dec 2, 12:45
no f*cking way. -- nm - znufrii Dec 2, 12:41
[deleted]

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my workfriend lisa is on a jesus cruise right now. no drinking, no swearing, no sex, no smoking for seven days. seven days.

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