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friday hax chat q: she and bf just got engaged. but her father is one of those guys who tweeted bad things when the Caps won

Posted by pixitude (aka chris) Apr 27 '12, 10:07

PAPA DON'T PREACH

My boyfriend of 2 ½ years recently proposed. What I had expected to be a happy and exciting new time in my life has become discouraged and stressful due to the arrival of an e-mail from my father 2 weeks after our engagement. He told me that we didn't have the "right to pollute the gene pool with our bi-racial children" and that though he knew I was a grown woman and could do as I pleased it should be understood that he didn't approve. During the entirety of my relationship my father has never once stated his feelings on this issue - so I was somewhat shocked by his statement. Though, not entirely surprised. I want to respond to his e-mail in a way that makes it clear that while I've heard what he has to say on the subject- it changes nothing. I will be marrying this amazing man and beyond this one e-mail I will not hear or respond to anything on the topic ever again. Right now my anger at the way my fiance has been made to feel makes the calm demeanor needed to write these words rather hard to come by. Any suggestions?

Responses:

You know who else wanted an unpolluted gene pool? -- nm - David Apr 27, 10:27
"..so I was somewhat shocked by his statement. Though, not entirely surprised." - b. Apr 27, 10:18 10
- My first father-in-law used to bitch about black quarterbacks every damned football game but I'd like to think that if his only daughter married... - David Apr 27, 10:29 6
  - that's sort of different? - b. Apr 27, 10:43
  - did you ever think about playing that card as a joke? -- nm - Reagen Apr 27, 10:32 3
    - Showing up dressed as Al Jolson the first time I met them? -- nm - David Apr 27, 10:33
    - like wearing blackface? -- nm - loosilu Apr 27, 10:33 1
      - Yes, loosi, I meant blackface. -- nm - Reagen Apr 27, 10:33
  - Especially if it was one of those highly paid black qb's. -- nm - Will Hunting Apr 27, 10:31
- I think maybe it's that even if your dad is a racist crazy person, the fact that he never said peep the whole relationship, and then BAM on e-mail? - TFox Apr 27, 10:24
- I think this means "not surprised that he'd say something racist, but shocked that he'd say this about my boyfriend and our unborn children" -- nm - Roger More Apr 27, 10:23
- "I was starving. Though, not really hungry." -- nm - Dr.Vermin Apr 27, 10:19
He said you could "do as you pleased". So, case closed. Ignore. - Dr.Vermin Apr 27, 10:15 3
- [deleted] 2
  - The dad's 'sentiment' doesn't really deserve a ton of attention (and therefore validation) either way. - Dr.Vermin Apr 27, 10:26 1
    - The fight has already started. I agree with what b. said in her IM above - that all she needs to say is a direct quote from her haxchat letter. -- nm - Roger More Apr 27, 10:28
[deleted]
Clearly, the reason he took some time to make his feelings known was he got an advanced degree in genetics -- nm - con_carne Apr 27, 10:14
anyone said that to me they'd be out of my life. (it's actually pretty much why I don't talk to my grandmother) -- nm - mafic Apr 27, 10:13
simple - znufrii Apr 27, 10:11
"Sorry you feel that way dad. Thanks for this final life lesson. Bye." -- nm - Will Hunting Apr 27, 10:10
wow. -- nm - TFox Apr 27, 10:09 15
- sad part is, he's black :) -- nm - oblique Apr 27, 10:11 14
  - the dad - oblique Apr 27, 10:11 13
    - i don't think it's 100% clear which race each member of the couple is, actually. -- nm - TFox Apr 27, 10:14 9
      - not that it matters. -- nm - znufrii Apr 27, 10:16 7
        
        oh, it's way more defensible if the dad is black. -- nm - TFox Apr 27, 10:17 6
        
        'Cism is 'cism. -- nm - David Apr 27, 10:26
        
        [checks sarcasm detector] -- nm - Dr.Vermin Apr 27, 10:23 4
        
        [check your IM detector] -- nm - TFox Apr 27, 10:27 3
        
        *dammit* -- nm - Dr.Vermin needs a ton of batteries Apr 27, 10:28 2
        
        x 2 -- nm - David Apr 27, 10:31
        
        If only there was a way to check the IM while replying to a post! -- nm - Roger More Apr 27, 10:31
      - I think the dad is black and the fiancee is Russian -- nm - oblique Apr 27, 10:15
    - and has sex with pets on the bed! -- nm - mafic Apr 27, 10:14 2
      - somethings sound so much better in your head -- nm - oblique Apr 27, 10:14 1
        
        You mean, your real-life sex with pets on the bed didn't match up with the fantasy? -- nm - Roger More Apr 27, 10:25

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friday hax chat q: she and bf just got engaged. but her father is one of those guys who tweeted bad things when the Caps won

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