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Question forlike Andie/Pip etc (ladies)

Posted by Capstern Oct 1 '13, 12:43

OK I have been with Angie and living with all the girls for a year and a half. I have done really well not putting my nose into stuff that Mom shoul dhandle and then longer I have been there to back her up the more control shes been slowly re-exerting so thats all pretty good.

Couple things going on that I would love some advice on - not saying I feel a need to be INVOLVED with some of it but would like to ask so I have a contingency plan.

So here it goes:
1) The middle child about to turn 17 had a kid she was with for like 17 months - great kid - eagle scout, job and more or less a great kid (and good fear and respct of me) they broke up while she had he summer job. Her first real job. Most of the people were a couple years older and I think she went through the my world is much larger and wow options phase (we had to shut down hanging out late with anyone over 18 or 19 differnt story). Now they are back at school and all of a sudden then hang out all the time. She says they are just friends but they snuggle and go places etc. My suspicion is they are together or very close and shes embarassed to admit it or confirm it like we might judge or mock her for changing her mind. No we love this kid hes great. Do we just pretend to be ignorant or do we be "look if you guys are together again we are ok with that and look people change minds and things happen just be happy" ?

2)The youngest at 11 has ummmm "started" and apparently with older sisters this is some huge embarassing event. Again I think I just pretend to be oblivious dadlike guy. We have gotten to where we would do something every other week just Ash and I - trying to bond some. Been mostly action movies or games or something. Now she asked if we could have that Dave Ash time be - shopping or pedicures...I cant tell if this is a maturing thing or shes messing with me. I mean I miss the movies but happy to try to keep up the good path...

just wondering what advice the ladies have. I live in a house with 3 daughter-like people and some days feel seriosuly outnumbered and overwhelmed

Responses:

Honest thanks. I feel like I got nearly 100% helpful stuff and minimal give cappy shit. Thanks! -- nm - Capstern Oct 1, 12:57
1) she's likely to never admit to ' dating' anyone ever again, just ignore it 2) bonding time, I'd said do half and half - Epiphany Oct 1, 12:55 1
- Thanks. Genius -- nm - Capstern Oct 1, 12:56
"Hey A, not being a girl, most of this daughter stuff is beyond me and I've figured it's your territory, but if you ever want me to be involved - Max Oct 1, 12:52
Not a lady...but on #1, let it roll. If you push too much, she'll stop telling y'all anything. Whether or not she's back with the kid - Jim Oct 1, 12:47 8
- Thx - Capstern Oct 1, 12:54 7
  - Well it scares the crap out of me. At 11 there are neighborhood boys at my house - Capstern Oct 1, 12:59
  - you asked ladies for advice but thanked jim because he gave you the answer you wanted. I don't much care. - amanda hk Oct 1, 12:58 4
    - Maybe he thanked me because I'm right! Ever think of that?? Can I get a witness?!?! -- nm - Jim Oct 1, 13:11
    - I had not set expectation. I admit to being clueless and guessing. But you are - Capstern Oct 1, 13:00 2
      - as are you. so there's that as well to be thankful for. -- nm - amanda hk Oct 1, 13:01 1
        
        yup nice foundation. -- nm - Capstern Oct 1, 13:03
  - this post creeps me out. nm -- nm - groiny Oct 1, 12:57
do not bring up anything, ever, about either thing. -- nm - Andie Oct 1, 12:44 6
- Sorta suspected this. Wanted to make sure the instinct was sound. - Capstern Oct 1, 12:52 1
  - at their ages, step dad is an ugly word. nm -- nm - groiny Oct 1, 12:54
- "never speak, just give them money every week" -- nm - groiny Oct 1, 12:47 2
  - The 2 eldest have jobs. I just bill them for certain things like car insurance :) -- nm - Capstern Oct 1, 12:58
  - Hey that rhymed! -- nm - Shaun Oct 1, 12:49
- this is a better answer. unless you are specifically asked by the mother. don't ask her. wait for her to ask you. -- nm - amanda hk Oct 1, 12:45
you're not a parent. ask their mother what an appropriate course of action for you is. -- nm - amanda hk Oct 1, 12:44 4
- At 18 months they look to me as a parental unit. Or so I am called. I cant defer everything forever - Capstern Oct 1, 12:51 3
  - ha ha ha. ha ha ha. no they don't. authority figure maybe. parent? no way in hell. -- nm - amanda hk Oct 1, 12:55 1
    - Well guess just go by how they act. Call me parental unit to friends and step-dad to people they introduce me too. Sigh -- nm - Capstern Oct 1, 12:56
  - you will never be their father, you can be there if they need you for something - groiny Oct 1, 12:52

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Question forlike Andie/Pip etc (ladies)

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