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In response to
"give me some lies i can tell about myself to the Jeopardy! producers to make them want me -- nm"
by
alpine misanthrope
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Ok, I'll do my best, how about something like this: My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade
Posted by
Trish (aka Trisha)
Feb 27 '09, 02:45
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narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
Seriously, you use this, they'll HAVE to put you on the air. I get 5% of your winnings if it works. ;p
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