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Vegas 2014 Blog - aka " Its all fun and games until someone gets stabbed by a stripper" Part 1
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this is long -
Thursday - Shay got us the hook up – Admirals club and seats with full leg room ( THANKS!) We race through the Vegas airport to meet up with Groiny who had been patiently waiting to share a cab ( no lines at the cab line- miracle) Threw our bags into our rooms and then me and Shay sprinted to the MGM to make our dinner reservations at Pub 1892 – Michael Mina’s place. It was very good – pulled pork sandwich and fries that were fried in duck fat. Then went back to the Excalibur and waited to meet up with peeps who ate at the Burger Bar – Mop landed and was looking lost on the floor of Excalibur so I went to rescue him –easy to spot he looks just like his Facebook photo. The other guys showed up – Ty was drunk and hyper ( red bull is the devil), Jack Dawson more so. Some strange dude made me guess who he was – turned out to be Banzaii ( LOL). I almost thought it was some guy they’d picked up in the Burger Bar. I called it a night – the guys stayed up and drank.
Friday – breakfast at the Luxor Café, yummy bacon pecan waffles I’d eat there again. I finally got to meet Jen Bro! She’s lovely and energetic (just like on the board)
Lotus of Siam dinner was an all-inclusive group dinner. Truman brought Diva a bottle of Tequila that had her name on it – Diva Tequila. It’s in a beautiful, elegant bottle ( like our Diva). I sat at a corner and caught up with Tru, Mel/Diva. Food was amazing. Had Northern Larb ( think pei wei lettuce wrap filling with pork instead of chicken and some type of unknown exotic seasoning) – very spicy. But the star of the menu was the Garlic Prawns. To die for. Ty and Jack Dawson – drunk yet again. Possible there were sake bombs going off down at the other end of the table. We all loaded into a limo sent by the Olympic Gardens to pick up the club goers. We almost didn’t fit but we squeezed in – not a long ride and the Karaoke Bar we were going to after the club, in a brilliant stroke of fate, was right across the STREET! Inside the club the strippers were friendly but it was clearly the “ C” team. It was early and yet this is likely a place where strippers of yore go to die. LOL. At one point, Mel got an unexpected lap dance and as this stripper is sprawled across him, he looks at her and says “this is Carolyn, my wife” and nods towards Diva who is sitting next to him. It was so causal and matter of fact. I’m pretty sure its throwing a stripper off her game when 6 other people burst out laughing. I gave a dollar and got unexpectedly boobie face smashed. Its sort of like the Spanish Inquisition – no one expects that. Ha.
Upstairs was where the real talent was – the male strippers took the whole Magic Mike movie as a playbook and learned every move. Most of them even dressed like Magic Mike. We were front and center when they opened and we had the place to ourselves(Ty, Jack Dawson, Diva, Chun and I) – The 1st dancer was the best and Ty wants to marry him ( I don’t disagree – he was HAWT and could dance his ass off) – Chun said on the way up she was going to get the strippers to show the goods – so she was giving dollars and trying to sneak the G-string to the side – the 1st guy was wagging his finger and saying no – but his smirk said YES! Lol. It was very cool – for the 1st 20 min we had the place to ourselves – our own personal strip club! Then the manager approached us and said they wanted to try out a new routine (apparently the Joker’s Blood Tango! Who knew?) and was there a volunteer? – Chun got on stage and they put her in a chair. The loud speaker was playing the Joker’s monolog from Batman and this crazy assed stripper was in a suit and Joker Mask. He came on stage and was stalking around. Chun was into it even when he brought out a switch blade knife( it was the kind that you hit a button and it pops out) He is still moving around the stage and Chun is out of her seat getting into the movements ( think interpretative dance with John Woo slow motion moves) At one point she waves her arms out and is closing her hands near his hands ( think this is when she got cut), she sits down and he’s still wandering around the stage – she looks down and her finger is bleeding but not much – like a paper cut so she’s still into it ( rolling with the show) and then she gets on all fours and panther walks down the stripper stage leaving blood in her wake. There were droplets everywhere – she’s still going – her and the Joker play scuffle and she sits down and by then, its evident she’s bleeding pretty good – they stop the music and come to tend to her – she comes off stage, they bandage her up, they wipe down the floor and the show goes on. Management is with Chun and Dawson and she’s bleeding through towels. EMTs come to fix her up and they sat her and the rest of us in VIP where free drinks were given. To her credit, the party never stopped, she is a Trooper. I went downstairs, got Mop and Mel came up too – then the rest of the guys came up ( minus Budice who was not seeing no dudes wiggling their junk!). They’re impression of what goes on at the male strip clubs vs female strip clubs was blowing their minds ( they can add on to this – I incorrectly assumed they knew all of this beforehand). The po-po showed up to take an injury statement and I bailed. Jack Dawson the Amped Up Attorney had things well in hand at this point.
I headed back to the Excalibur and had a great late night meal at Johnny Rockets with Cuzzin Todd.
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Responses:
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PSA : When Dawson says they will be done after the next round, that means 45 minutes. nm -- nm
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groiny
May 20, 08:17
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...at which point, things get really interesting. -- nm
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Mop (205 lbs)
May 20, 08:16
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"...( think interpretative dance with John Woo slow motion moves)" -- nm
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Diva
May 20, 08:14
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Good call, budice! -- nm
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Strongbad
May 20, 08:09
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- [deleted]
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Wait, you guys lucked out and were in the same terminal!?! -- nm
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Spawn Lord
May 20, 08:06
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please add on - I didn't go to Ferris Wheel, Valley of Fire, 1st Burger Bar - etc, etc -- nm
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Pippy kissed by Spawn and I liked it
May 20, 08:02
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