ST Alpha - "I really dislike what "feminist" has become in the everyday. it's all "I want all the same things dudes do" and "buy me dinner."" (Reading a Post)

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In response to "I have to say, the recent surge of talks about feminism and how women are represented everywhere actually made me think about myself and realize some " by Guigue

I really dislike what "feminist" has become in the everyday. it's all "I want all the same things dudes do" and "buy me dinner."

Posted by vice president peggy ann (aka amanda) Sep 23 '14, 14:19

you can't have it both ways. you can't bitch about patriarchal society and expect that dudes will open doors for you (unless they are the really nice kind of dude who opens doors for everyone).

feminists should want "all things equal." not "all things equal except what makes me feel pretty."

I don't let dudes buy me drinks or dinner anymore unless I think I'll have a chance to reciprocate. (I do let dudes drive me everywhere though. I'm not crazy. in return I wear microskirts so I think this is fair.)

Responses:

[deleted]
in the main, I view it as not allowing traditional gender roles to dictate what someone can and cannot do. -- nm - Reagen Sep 23, 14:25 12
- but it's so much more than that. "equal pay for equal work" but "you always have to buy when we go out"? no. -- nm - vice president peggy ann Sep 23, 14:27 11
  - I think both sides have privledges they're not willing to give up easily. - Reagen Sep 23, 14:35 10
    - What are the dude privileges? -- nm - Max Sep 23, 14:49 9
      - nmbl -- (link) - mara Sep 23, 16:33 3
        
        oh, I was thinking in terms of interpersonal relationships. Women get free dinner, guy gets to hold the tv remote etc. Not societal privileges. -- nm - Max Sep 23, 17:36 2
        
        That's the thing: female privileges tend to be courtesys, male priviliges tend to have dollar values or power imbalances attached. -- nm - Reagen Sep 23, 18:02
        
        ::types, deletes, types, deletes:: - b. Sep 23, 18:01
      - the default to basically every position of power, for a start -- nm - Reagen Sep 23, 16:28
      - Dudes get a society made by dudes for dudes. -- nm - Roger More Sep 23, 15:22 3
        
        So it's like, if chicks are nice to me, I get to bring them stuff? -- nm - Max Sep 23, 15:25 2
        
        But chicks have to be nice to you, so they're even worse off than you are. -- nm - Roger More Sep 23, 15:49
        
        right. that's exactly it. - b. Sep 23, 15:34
"She's wearing a skirt, we're gonna score!" -- nm - dudes in State College Sep 23, 14:22

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I really dislike what "feminist" has become in the everyday. it's all "I want all the same things dudes do" and "buy me dinner."

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