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In response to
"Isn't she married? What does her husband say/do about this? -- nm"
by
kelly
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she is.
Posted by
b. (aka starrynit)
Jul 16 '15, 16:38
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she's a very controlling and manipulative person, including with him. absolutely, we can say he should have taken strong action long ago; but her kind of personality is extremely hard to deal with, and he is a good guy. if it wasn't for that and her health issues, I think he would have left her long ago.
if you've ever watched "hoarders" shows, this kind of thing is seen all the time. often, the partner gets worn down over time and stops trying.
in this case, he's still tried sometimes; but it just gets really nasty and bad, and, with her health issues, there are a lot of attempts to make it seem she's a victim. too often, that works for people who don't know the truth of their situation; and then he's stuck again and gives up.
she takes very little responsibility for anything that's wrong in her life. it's incredibly frustrating.
in retrospect, I know I enabled her; but, at the various times, I absolutely thought I was doing the right thing. that's part of a manipulator's success.
it continues now in no small part because of her major health issues and that they were meant to move out of their rental house more than a year ago, and because I'm a freaking decent and caring person. ugh.
the worst part may be that I don't think she actually cares about me beyond what I can do for her. that's a helluva thing to accept.
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