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In response to
"Ok...seeing that your daughter is 16, it makes my thoughts the same as my initial thought..."
by
Jim
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I generally agree with this, but the difficulty is that the reality is much less rational than this.
Posted by
pmb (aka pmb)
Apr 13 '09, 11:37
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I mean this generally been my approach, but the others are not responding rationally, it's pure emotion. What I'm finding is that rationality doesn't fix that. To be fair to my daughter here, she's not taken the position that I should not get married, just that she doesn't want to deal with it that much. And she says that she feels that it has brought forth issues in her relationship with me that makes her not as happy at my house too (though she's very non-specific about what those are and I'm pretty sure they would be solved by my fiance not being around). And, yes, my fiance has overreacted too and she feels the rejection and shuts down rather than persistently being engaging and friendly. I know that it can't be fun to be in that position, but I'm also confident that I would be tough enough to suck it up and do it anyway and not take the rejection personally (because it really isn't personal). I'm not sure she is. The therapist told her to have no expectations and work for the best case scenario of it being a year before things settle in well. She can't really deal with that time frame.
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