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pmb, as with most things, the only way to learn to deal with kids is to observe, mimic, fail, try again.

Posted by mandy lane has totally lost track of days (aka amanda) Apr 13 '09, 11:41

I would have no idea how to deal with children had I not watched ross grow up and move through phases of hating me, loving me, tolerating me, and treating me like a verbal punching bag.

because I lived through ross's early adolescence and having reflected on my own teenage bitchiness and angst, I am able to deal with children almost as easily as I am with adults now.

it just takes getting your hands really dirty, and being willing to take the small failures with the small victories. I hope your fiancee can learn this quickly.

again, I wish you the very, very best.

Responses:

i think you're point of them being *teenage* girls is huge. - Andie Apr 13, 11:45 23
- but to devil's advocate a bit, how many teenage girls *do* get along with their fathers' new SO? it can work sometimes. so maybe there's more to it. - kare Apr 13, 11:53 12
  - I think part of it is that fact that he gave so much for so long. Now he wants something for him. -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 11:55 11
    - Exactly. He's done nothing but think of EVERYone else since the whole divorce thing began. If you ask me... - Jim Apr 13, 11:56 9
      - And like I said, a few years down the road the daughter will look back on what the mother did, and whatthe father did and realize which one did it - Spawn Apr 13, 11:58
      - but he's having to worry about the fiancee's happiness, too - kare Apr 13, 11:58 7
        
        She is terrified to enter *their* home. I would be, too. - Spawn Apr 13, 12:00 6
        
        that's true. i feel freaked out at the idea of moving into my bf's home, and there isn't an ex nor kids. (just a roommate who i think will *never* - kare Apr 13, 12:04 5
        
        Honestly that's one of the biggest problems for me. - pmb Apr 13, 12:12 1
        
        i don't mean to be all gloom and doom - kare Apr 13, 12:22
        
        !!! -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 12:07
        
        wait - *are* you moving in?? -- nm - Andie Apr 13, 12:06 1
        
        no no. just an eventual thing. :) - kare Apr 13, 12:08
    - it's really unfair. -- nm - kare Apr 13, 11:56
- I agree completely, but I can't seem to get my fiancee to accept it . - pmb Apr 13, 11:51 1
  - god, i wish i could go out for a lot of drinks with your fiancee. - Andie Apr 13, 12:05
- I HAVE TWO DAUGHTERS! STOP TELLING ME THIS STUFF! :) -- nm - Subversive Apr 13, 11:49 5
  - [deleted]
  - Oh dude...YOUR daughters won't be like that. They'll be respectful and perfect, just like they are now. ;) -- nm - Jim Apr 13, 11:50 3
    - Obviously. -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 11:54
    - I love you, man. -- nm - Subversive Apr 13, 11:50 1
      - It's what I'm here for. :) -- nm - Jim Apr 13, 11:51
- And this is a huge part of why I'm with Spawn on the fiancee's "side" of this, if there is such a thing. - Jim Apr 13, 11:48
- [deleted]

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pmb, as with most things, the only way to learn to deal with kids is to observe, mimic, fail, try again.

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