ST Alpha - "One last post for pmb and a question for the ST ladies...is it actually uncommon for a woman to not want to move into the ex's house?" (Reading a Post)

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One last post for pmb and a question for the ST ladies...is it actually uncommon for a woman to not want to move into the ex's house?

Posted by Jim (aka Jim) Apr 13 '09, 12:49

I don't think guys care about that shit...but it would seem to me that a lot of women would not like idea of moving into the house that you shared with an ex-wife.

Am I crazy in thinking that...or could her trepidation about moving into this situation be almost as normal as a teenage girl being all about herself?

Thoughts?

Responses:

I wouldn't like it. I'd do it and then change everything to make it reflective of " us" - Epiphany Apr 13, 12:55
I wonder what would be her response if he asked her about looking for a new home. -- nm - zork Apr 13, 12:53 20
- That's what I'm thinking. What if he were to say to her...we're not putting any more money into changing anything in this house. - Jim Apr 13, 12:53 19
  - My feelings on this were that I didn't want to take the house away from the kids. - pmb Apr 13, 12:57 8
    - Anyway...though...it seems like the feelings your daughters have are normal and the feelings your fiancee has are normal... - Jim Apr 13, 13:04
    - oh, of course. -- nm - Andie Apr 13, 13:00
    - I can understand that, but it might cost you your finance. -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 12:59 5
      - his fiancee too -- nm - zork Apr 13, 13:00
      - But he's monocle... -- nm - Diva Apr 13, 13:00 3
        
        lol. It is impossible to say "finance" (on the phone) and type "finance"!!! -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 13:06 1
        
        I'm thinking he has a fiancee and not a fiance - zork Apr 13, 13:12
        
        He probably has lots of finance. -- nm - Inigo Apr 13, 13:06
  - That would make his daughters feely completely displaced. In their minds they are having to give up their home for her. -- nm - jnine Apr 13, 12:54 9
    - So instead...he should give up his fiancee for them? -- nm - Jim Apr 13, 13:02 3
      - No. But this is something I think his fiancee has to compromise on, for now. -- nm - jnine Apr 13, 13:04
      - to be fair, this isn't as simple as 'the issues will all go away if they move." it's painfully complex. :( -- nm - Andie Apr 13, 13:03 1
        
        Maybe. maybe not. Seems to me the wife-to-be wants some sort of token/sign/something that says he's in this for the long haul with her. - Jim Apr 13, 13:05
    - he doesn't have to say to them that this is the reason. He could say that there are too many painful memories for himself there -- nm - zork Apr 13, 12:58 3
      - kids are more clever than you give them credit for. -- nm - znufrii Apr 13, 12:59 2
        
        I'm not saying that he needs to fool them, but he can tell them that his primary motivator is the history there. -- nm - zork Apr 13, 13:01 1
        
        They are going to see right through that. It's important to be honest during a difficult time like this. -- nm - jnine Apr 13, 13:02
    - I agree with this. -- nm - loosilu Apr 13, 12:56
I would be uncomfortable moving into a house where everyone already is established and has their routine. The more time I spent there before I moved - jnine Apr 13, 12:51
hmmm, that's a hard question that depends on a lot of factors. Overall I probably would not care ... unless there was a lot of "her" in that house, - loosilu Apr 13, 12:51
I can not imagine a woman would jump at the chance. -- nm - Spawn Apr 13, 12:51
truthfully, i'd have a REAL hard time with that. it might not be a 'deal breaker', but it would be hard. - Andie Apr 13, 12:51 1
- the china thing is totally understandable to me. -- nm - loosilu Apr 13, 12:52
I think you may be very correct here. -- nm - zork Apr 13, 12:50
[deleted] 1
- Not a woman?!? -- nm - Lug Apr 13, 12:57

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One last post for pmb and a question for the ST ladies...is it actually uncommon for a woman to not want to move into the ex's house?

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