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Posts: 164

Local paper ran a contest for 'best bar jokes,' this was one of the honorable mentions........ - MojaveMeg Apr 21, 13:14 3
- That's one of the oldest ones out there. -- nm - Ender Apr 21, 13:16 2
  - So's your face. (I thought it was funny.) -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:21 1
    - So's your mom! -- nm - Ender Apr 21, 13:22
Reuters corrects itself. - David Apr 21, 13:12 2
- Mop adjusts himself. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:15 1
  - Spawn censors himself. -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:17
I have a couple of co-workers who think they're quite clever. In a Dennis Miller sense. - Mop Apr 21, 13:12
Torres! -- nm - CQ Apr 21, 13:08
Explaqin to me why everyone is bagging on me for getting into a relationship after begin single for 4 YEARS. Trish is already telling me to get out. - Stacy Apr 21, 13:06 52
- heh. banner ad for Mate1 on this page ... "find love in your area!" -- nm - zork Apr 21, 13:25
- I still don't know if you're a dude trying to become a lesbian girl or a lesbian girl trying to become a straight dude. -- nm - Loyola Apr 21, 13:14 3
  - She's a man in a woman's body who dates lesbians, IIRC. -- nm - mara Apr 21, 13:22
  - Also bagging is a verb, like from teabagging? I need to keep up. -- nm - Loyola Apr 21, 13:15 1
    - It means 'criticising'. It's not from tea-bagging -- nm - Roger More Apr 21, 13:21
- *slowly walks out of the room* - lileve Apr 21, 13:13
- I just think your stories are too far-fetched to be the truth. -- nm - Inigo Apr 21, 13:11 4
  - I think they're too farfetched *not* to be. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 13:13
  - i know. - Andie Apr 21, 13:12 1
    - And that breaks my heart. I keep hoping for a reveal one day that would be awesome. -- nm - Name Withheld By Request Apr 21, 13:14
  - she's become ST's own private version of Coach, really. -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:12
- I for one, am happy for you and hope it works out for the best. - znufrii Apr 21, 13:11 3
  - [deleted] 2
    - hee! - znufrii Apr 21, 13:12 1
      - 25 Spawn Points -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:14
- Explain to me based on past experiences, why you're even telling ST about this? -- nm - Strongbad Apr 21, 13:09 16
  - good question, I guess I was trying to share, some people on here care and dont have prejudices about people living in foreign countries -- nm - Stacy Apr 21, 13:13 15
    - The prejudice here is limited to people living on different planets. -- nm - Max Apr 21, 13:17 6
      - *Awesome*. -- nm - kelly Apr 21, 13:20
      - oof. -- nm - Diva Apr 21, 13:19
      - *shakes fist* -- nm - landbeck Apr 21, 13:19
      - My boss just heard me laugh -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 13:19
      - heh. -- nm - TFox Apr 21, 13:18
      - *golf clap* -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 13:18
    - *laughing*, you think this is about prejudices about people living in foreign countries? - Andie Apr 21, 13:14 7
      - well last night pixie said at least she isnt from nigeria, and there have already been several indian jokes on here. -- nm - Stacy Apr 21, 13:17 6
        
        Name the only STer to send money to Nigeria in a scam? -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:19
        
        Not jokes about Indian people. Jokes about you dating an Indian person. - TFox Apr 21, 13:18
        
        That's because those countries are wretched hives of scum and villainy that use the internet to con people. -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:18
        
        you have no idea where she really is. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 13:17 2
        
        I agree. Also, she has no idea *IF* she really "is". -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:20
        
        *ding* -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 13:20
- ST is inherently anti-gay. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:08 3
  - I think the fact that we treat hotkiss the same way as Stacy shoots that theory down. -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:09 2
    - I thought my comment was so absurd as to be easily viewed as a joke. After all, ST is 90% gay. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:13 1
      - Oh, I know. - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:26
- well, let's see,,, you have a history of falling for scams, you are easily taken advantage of by women you find attractive, - Andie Apr 21, 13:07 15
  - "Long distance" is one thing. It's a different level though if you need to get Immigration and Customs involved. -- nm - Ender Apr 21, 13:20
  - she isnt a stranger we have been friends on 3 months. Triah and Crash met on the internet, so did Spawn and Amy and Diva and Mel. -- nm - Stacy Apr 21, 13:09 12
    - The point is, they *met*. (In person.) There's nothing wrong with having in internet relationship. She's just not really a girlfriend until you meet. -- nm - mara Apr 21, 13:21
    - Mel and Diva started dating shortly after they met face to face. -- nm - Diva Apr 21, 13:12
    - well, for starters, I think they all lived in the same country ... on the same continent ... but I could be wrong. -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:11 3
      - why should that matter? long distance realtionships are long distance realtionships....she is visiting me soon and she is paying for the airfare -- nm - Stacy Apr 21, 13:20 2
        
        have you, you know, spoken to her on the phone? do you HAVE a phone #? - Andie Apr 21, 13:21
        
        Hey, post that, assuming you still have all your debit cards, lamps, and silverware, it's a different ballgame. -- nm - TFox Apr 21, 13:21
    - As an isolated fact, yes, relationships can work out that start on the Internet. - TFox Apr 21, 13:11
    - well, Amy and Spawn didn't. but, they also were part of a community for years, spoke on the phone, etc etc. - Andie Apr 21, 13:11
    - Mel, Amy and Crash don't exist. -- nm - David Apr 21, 13:10 3
      - I always wondered.... -- nm - Name Withheld By Request Apr 21, 13:10 2
        
        Diva and trish are actually mine. - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:12 1
        
        damnit!! -- nm - truman si Apr 21, 13:12
  - The heart wants what the heart wants! -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:09
An ACTUAL line from the new Jennifer Garner movie: "Dames are like horses" -- nm - secretslacker Apr 21, 13:00 2
- Autobiographical? -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 13:02
- I like how they give away the ending in the ad. Love that. -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 13:01
They call it a precipitous birth. We left the house at 4:45. Baby was born by 5:36. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 12:54 26
- good thing you didn't hit traffic. - znufrii Apr 21, 13:08 1
  - but then they would have been on the news! -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 13:09
- nice! -- nm - Col. Remlik Apr 21, 13:04
- congrats! -- nm - crash davis Apr 21, 13:02
- Holy Crap. Congrats. -- nm - Mel Profit Apr 21, 13:01
- Flawless victory. -- nm - TFox Apr 21, 12:59
- Don Homer! -- nm - Strongbad Apr 21, 12:59
- VFN! I missed this. Congrats! -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:58 1
  - very fine ... ? very fast... ? help a sista out. -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 12:59
- That's crazy. Congrats. -- nm - Inigo Apr 21, 12:58
- Wow well done Mop! - Loyola Apr 21, 12:57
- Congratulations! -- nm - lileve Apr 21, 12:57
- yeah, nice timing! (name?) -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 12:56 9
  - Katherine Audrey. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 12:59 8
    - what not Cortina? - tRuMaN Apr 21, 13:08 1
      - So are you. (Cortana.) -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 13:10
    - love it. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 13:01
    - That's lovely -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 13:00
    - lovely, classy, classic! -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 13:00 3
      - My 4-year-old son basically named her (Baby Katie, he said). Glad he didn't go with Charmander. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:05
      - I'd nickname her Hepburn. -- nm - Mel Profit Apr 21, 13:01 1
        
        What burns, now? -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:05
- awesome news! congrats! -- nm - CQ Apr 21, 12:56
- You have a new baby? Congratulations! -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:56
- Congratulations on the new Mopette!! -- nm - JaxSean Apr 21, 12:56
- wow! (i haven't added my congratulations yet, so congratulations to you guys) -- nm - prayformojo Apr 21, 12:55
LIR: Zork. -- (link) - lileve Apr 21, 12:53 2
- you bought this for me? - zork Apr 21, 12:54 1
  - it opens my door too. -- nm - lileve Apr 21, 12:55
Adam Carolla and Bill Simmons discussing the new Fast & the Furious movie is pretty funny -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 12:51 6
- The slamming of Jordanna Brewster's acting is hilarious -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 13:02
- Is Carolla still doing his podcast? -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:53 3
  - #1 in comedy on ITunes IIRC -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 12:54 2
    - And #4 overall. -- nm - Ender Apr 21, 12:59
    - also has a pilot for CBS casting -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 12:54
- Is it more fast or more furious? -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 12:52
I noticed that pretty much the entire production of Pop Idol moved to Britain's Got Talent. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 12:51 3
- I see. And what are your thoughts about that? -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:52 1
  - I missed Dank and Scud. Glad to see them again. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 12:55
- I would also like to thank Susan Boyle (and the attention she's drawn to the show) for this horror I've just been subjected to. -- (link) - Mop Apr 21, 12:52
you know what's really, really frustrating? - loosilu Apr 21, 12:49 26
- meeting a nice, caring loveable straight guy who is willing to commit? -- nm - peglegpete Apr 21, 12:59
- When you tie your shoelaces and they won't f*cking stay tied! -- nm - Loyola Apr 21, 12:55 1
  - That's why they invented me! (the I'm so cool nm) - Velcro Apr 21, 12:57
- A mirror. -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:55
- Crabs? Running with big boobs and no sports bra? Diarrhea? -- nm - JaxSean Apr 21, 12:54 4
  - I would call those more *uncomfortable* than frustrating. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 12:54
  - ... all at once -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:54 2
    - ha! -- nm - nubby Apr 21, 13:02
    - ....in bed. -- nm - JaxSean Apr 21, 12:55
- the vibrate cycle on the washing machine doesnt work? -- nm - tRuMaN Apr 21, 12:53
- I thought Berry's freshness comment below was for this for some reason. -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 12:53
- 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife? -- nm - CQ Apr 21, 12:52 3
  - Bzzzzzt. That's ironic. -- nm - Jim Apr 21, 12:52 2
    - NO IT ISN'T IRONIC!!! -- nm - Literally Literal People Apr 21, 12:55 1
      - Don't make me cut you. -- nm - Alanis Apr 21, 12:56
- Workplace territorialism -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:51 6
  - CLose! I'm trying to hire people in Rwanda through our office in Ethiopia. - loosilu Apr 21, 12:54 5
    - Dude, it's Africa. Marathon runners are their pony express. Give it time, woman! -- nm - CQ Apr 21, 12:56 1
      - marathon runners would have done it twice as fast. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 12:56
    - Experience: Somali Pirate -- nm - Beaker Apr 21, 12:55 2
      - can he write in English? hired. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 12:56 1
        
        "Surrender Your Women And Nike Shoes" -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 12:56
- When someone asks a question in the sunject line and then doesn't give the answer in the IM? -- nm - Jim Apr 21, 12:51 1
  - the subject line too. -- nm - Jim Apr 21, 12:51
- clamshell packaging. -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 12:51 1
  - that too. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 12:52
That's right. She's playing Pokemon. - David Apr 21, 12:48 4
- heh -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:54
- Freshness. -- (link) - Beryllium Apr 21, 12:50 1
  - Ah, yes. That's the one that immediately came to mind. -- nm - Mop Apr 21, 13:03
- That one's fantastic. (Why don't I read Penny Arcade?) -- nm - TFox Apr 21, 12:49
It's -- nm - mobile browsing loves mandy lane Apr 21, 12:47 12
- :: cues up the Monty Python music :: -- nm - i'm not dead yet ! Apr 21, 12:53
- Stephen King sequel! -- nm - David Apr 21, 12:49 6
  - Its -- nm - rewritten by stacy Apr 21, 12:50 5
    - Stacy? ru there? i'm in london. just got mugged...need $1500 to get back home. -- nm - India Apr 21, 12:55 2
      - nice. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 13:03
      - I think Stacy missed her calling as a professional shark jumper. -- nm - David Apr 21, 13:02
    - Your funny -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:52
    - Hee! -- nm - David Apr 21, 12:52
- y bitsy spider went up the water spout. -- nm - Loyola Apr 21, 12:48
- Monty Python's Flying Circus! -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:48
- the ballroom blitz? -- nm - crash davis Apr 21, 12:48
- Howdy Doody Time! -- nm - zork Apr 21, 12:48
LIR: This is the awesome - Rainbow Cake! -- (link) - lileve Apr 21, 12:47
Apparently the American Cancer Society demoted me... - Mel Profit Apr 21, 12:46 3
- No more rear for you! (thanks!) -- nm - JaxSean Apr 21, 12:48 2
  - Glad to. - Mel Profit Apr 21, 12:52 1
    - heh -- nm - JaxSean Apr 21, 12:58
I assume the server is running the latest Apache, right pmj? -- nm - Beryllium Apr 21, 12:45
File this under: "The early bird catches the worm." - Tickets for the Neil Gaiman reading in June went on sale on Thursday, i finally remember to buy - Andie Apr 21, 12:44 6
- Although, technically the worm was up early too, and he got eaten alive. Better to sleep in sometimes. -- nm - Loyola Apr 21, 12:50
- We have backstage passes and Amy may get to drive him from the airport! -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:48 2
  - that's *wicked!* -- nm - Andie Apr 21, 12:49 1
    - November! -- nm - Spawn: TT Fantasy Hoops Champion Apr 21, 12:55
- aw. -- nm - loosilu Apr 21, 12:46
- Andie... lost something??? -- nm - con_carne Apr 21, 12:44

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