ST Alpha - "friday hax chat quickie: he's having sex with three people (at different times, ftr). should they know about each other?" (Reading a Post)

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friday hax chat quickie: he's having sex with three people (at different times, ftr). should they know about each other?

Posted by pigby (aka chris) May 1 '09, 10:16

Anonymous: Hi Carolyn,

I am having sex with three people right now. (Not literally right now, but you get the idea.) Two of them have no idea there is anyone else and the third one might or might not. My friends say I'm being deceptive but I say it's fair game as long as I don't pretend I'm being exclusive and we always use protection. Who's right?

Responses:

he's (conditionally) right, not that he won't be blamed for it when the girls inevitably find out, though. - znufrii May 1, 10:27 6
- lying by withholding information is still lying. I think I'm on the fence. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:28 5
  - unless he thinks it's irrelevant. which, some may argue, it is. -- nm - kare May 1, 10:30 4
    - and he can't be expected to be a mind reader either. If it's a relevant issue to any of the girls, they should say something. - znufrii May 1, 10:31 1
      - i agree. -- nm - kare May 1, 10:32
    - condoms don't stop things like crabs and herpes. I'd want to know. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:31 1
      - and yet... if these girls were so worried about either of those, they should be very clear *and ask* -- nm - kare May 1, 10:33
i think it's the right thing for him to let them know. but it's not HORRIBLE if he doesn't. i wouldn't say it's a lie. - kare May 1, 10:27
[deleted] 11
- Although, in reality, what's the difference? If he jammed 30 girls in the past, or 28 in the past and 2 right now... - TFox May 1, 10:26 9
  - [deleted] 1
    - i like that you wait til AFTER. haha -- nm - Guy May 1, 10:30
  - I don't see how it would hurt him to be honest. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:27 6
    - if it was any other aspect of his life, he wouldn't be expected to proffer it up without any inquisition - Guy May 1, 10:29 2
      - but it could affect his partners' health and emotions, therefore it's their business. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:30 1
        
        health, obviously. condoms help. at this point, he's not responsible for their emotions. -- nm - kare May 1, 10:32
    - Becuase people aren't 'honest' when it comes to their feelings in relationships. "It's cool" is often "I'm hurt and we're on the slow road to pain." - Will Hunting May 1, 10:29
    - It would slow the flow of the poon juice. Obviously. -- nm - TFox May 1, 10:28 1
      - If he thinks it would bother them, then they deserve to know. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:28
- this is my thinking. I don't want to catch anything. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:25
He's fine, and honestly, it's not sounding like he'd be heartbroken about losing any of them if they found out. -- nm - TFox May 1, 10:24
He deserves to die. - Loyola May 1, 10:23
I think he's lying by omission. If it's cool, why hide it? -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:22 4
- Why bring it up? - Dr.Vermin, Space Monkey Mafia May 1, 10:28 3
  - if he's consciously not bringing it up, that indicates he knows it would bother them, therefore he's choosing to keep them in the dark. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:29 2
    - Which is often for the best. - Dr.Vermin, Space Monkey Mafia May 1, 10:31
    - i mean, i agree it's somewhat sleazy, but if these girls really want to know, they should ask. -- nm - kare May 1, 10:31
[deleted] 1
- totally. -- nm - kare May 1, 10:28
Info as presented, he's right. If they're thinking they're the only one and he's not being honest....it's sleazyish -- nm - Will Hunting May 1, 10:19
i think you can normally tell if a person wants to know/cares. - Guy May 1, 10:19
If you're not *lying*... if they're not asking "am I the only one?", then I think you're fine. - Dr.Vermin, Space Monkey Mafia May 1, 10:18
He's right, basically. Although there may be more deception going on than he's admitting to. One chick may be saying things that makes it obvious - mara May 1, 10:18 2
- I think his partners have a right to know, but maybe I'm weird. He seems to think he's being shady so that suggests he is. -- nm - loosilu for Chipacabra May 1, 10:23 1
  - no, his friends seem to think that. -- nm - Guy May 1, 10:24

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friday hax chat quickie: he's having sex with three people (at different times, ftr). should they know about each other?

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