ST Alpha - "I've taken to effing with robo calls now. About 1 in 10 gets it. " (Reading a Post)

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In response to "The problem is that so many of them come from Indian call centers that flaunt their illegality." by David

I've taken to effing with robo calls now. About 1 in 10 gets it.

Posted by Mel Profit (aka Mel Profit) Aug 16 '17, 14:41

I'll pretend to be:

Indian (dot)
English ("'ello guvn'r!")
Simple Mel ("I like flowers...")

I'll ask them to repeat things like 5 times in a row...

I'll ask them what color pants they're wearing

I'll ask them if they like GoT and start talking about the last episode

I'll ask them what was the bigger military mistake in WWII...Hitler Invading Russia or Hitler not destroying the English at Dunkirk

I'll ask them if they like the Patriots

I'll start talking about my growing affinity for rice pudding

I'll ask them about their net connection speed at home

I'll ask them to sing along with me to a rousing version of "It's a Long Way to Tipperary"

I'll ask them if they've ever had, measles, mumps, shingles or abdominal cramps that last more than 12hrs and then inform them that my Uncle had that once...but we don't talk about him now.

I'll ask them who they think would win in a fight...a giant snake, a giant bee or Gerry the King Lawler

I'll tell them I can solve a rubix cube in 120 seconds or less. If I can't I'll buy them a Whopper

I'll ask them if they like The Jerky Boys and if anything in their very recent past reminds them of their antics...

Responses:

I used to just say "Could you hold on just a second, there's someone at the door?" the just set the phone down. - Cuzzin Todd Aug 16, 15:07
and whenver they ask you annual income, it's in poverty level or lower -- nm - peglegpete Aug 16, 14:51 2
- oh, if you wanna keep them on the phone longer, you go the other direction. -- nm - groiny Aug 16, 14:52 1
  - not if it involves, "debt relief". -- nm - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:56
can you solve a rubix cube in 120 seconds or less?! -- nm - mud Aug 16, 14:51 2
- depends on how sticky the glue is on each individual cube. - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:54
- *throws rubiks cube out the window* - groiny Aug 16, 14:51
How giant is the bee? -- nm - David Aug 16, 14:46 6
- bigger than a bread basket but smaller than kilbo's ass. -- nm - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:48 5
  - Okay, as long as the snake's not 20 feet or larger, my money's on The King. -- nm - David Aug 16, 14:50 4
    - The snake, an amazonian python is 23ft long but we kept in the fridge for an hour to slow it up. Now what? - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:53 3
      - Wait wait wait, you can't unleash The Mountain and act like that's legal. -- nm - David Aug 16, 14:55 2
        
        you sound just like the guy trying to sell me on "debt relief". -- nm - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:59 1
        
        He's right *and* he can save you thousands of dollars! - David Aug 16, 15:17
there was a time when I would do this as well, but they seem to always get me when I am at work. - groiny Aug 16, 14:44 5
- and, there's an art to it. You can't blast them with crazy. You have to slowly escalate it. In fact... - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:46 3
  - I had been known to hand my daughter the phone when she was 4 or 5 when they called. -- (edited) - groiny Aug 16, 14:48 2
    - I love that bit. -- nm - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:49 1
      - it was that, and telling them all about my garden and the weather. -- nm - groiny Aug 16, 14:50
- best time, for me, was after hours obviously. Most of the time I don't pick up but there's a rare day or two when I feel like taking it out on someone -- nm - Mel Profit Aug 16, 14:45

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I've taken to effing with robo calls now. About 1 in 10 gets it.

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