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Speaking of those "un-called-for sexual advances" polls, I have a story from this past Monday night.

This is a thing where, if it was done to me by a young woman is it fine? But, if I did the same thing to her, would I be a massive creep? Is con_carne just looking for an excuse to tell this story? Probably.

Coworker throwing a party at his house. Attendance is pretty much all coworkers and their associates (Monday nights to us are like Friday nights). Mostly 20-somethings, I'm probably the oldest person there. I have a group, including my best friend Patty, but none of us are a couple. Really nice party. Good feelings all around (my workplace has a very strong "we're friends outside of work" culture).

I sat down with one group and said hi to a bunch of people. Soon, somebody passed a pen (cannabis in oil form) and I couldn't find the button. D showed me where the button was. All was good.

Then this group broke up and I parked myself in front of the TV. It is set up with a lot of chairs and people hanging out. More people arrived and they came over and hung out with me and then left.

Soon, D came over with her friend Steph and Em, the host. I said hi briefly and then turned away. But I noticed D is leaning hard against my chair back. I interpret this as a signal. I turned my back towards the wall so I could be social with them. I offered the seat to the women and they declined. Everybody is having a wonderful time.

D and I get along pretty well from work, but I barely know her. She's petite and standing up, I am tall but sitting down. She pressed her chest up against mine and her body was flush against my left arm. Our faces practically touching. I was correct about the signal. I remember thinking this was very nice. I felt an overwhelming need to get to know her better. But, since her face was all I could see, I start talking about her makeup (she had one of those fake gems stuck between her eyes, but you have to get close to inspect it). This is when I notice she is not drunk. Her eyes are clear. She is also inspecting me closely. We're joking around and having a blast. D is very handsy with me (above the waist), but since I am sitting in a bright place where everybody can see me, I don't reciprocate, I don't play force field, none of that. But I let her get as close as she wants, and I feel very good.

My coworker G and his gf were at the TV this whole time. He's a cool dude, but he couldn't help but stare at us. We looked like we were about to start making out right then and there in front of everybody. I find this funny, more than anything. And a signal that, hey, this is unusual.

D and S and E leave me alone for a while. Either the TV is off, or we play Smash Bros. I don't remember. Either way, everyone is still having a nice time. My best friend Patty is with a guy she likes M, but his friend is an obnoxious weirdo who crosses the line constantly with jokes and things he says. I have an eye on them.

Then D came back by herself and she threw her body on top of me again. More pleasantries ensue. Definitely more pairs of eyes on us this time. At this time, I made a crucial decision. I decide to NOT ask D if she wants to retire to a quiet place so we can get to know each other. This is something I normally would have done. Except I wasn't sure about my friend Patty's well-being because of obnoxious weirdo dude hanging out with her and M. I made my way over to P and M. Obnoxious dude was obnoxious and borderline getting people angry. Also, M was on some drug, but he wouldn't say which. Eventually, my original group I came to the party is all huddled together and NOT laughing at obnoxious dude's jokes. We're all looking out for Patty.

At this point, people start making their goodbyes and then leaving. M and his friend are still weirdos. They left a tad early, then came back just to say goodbye to everyone again.

I haven't talked to any of these players since then, except Em. who I thanked for the party the following day. I'm satisfied I made the right decision sticking with Patty, but am genuinely surprised she didn't go home with M (which would have been fine).


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