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In response to
"you are the ultimate helicopter dad"
by
decline
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thanks. We had very good people (professionals) along the way helping us at critical junctures (overshare)
Posted by
oblique (aka kkuphal)
Jul 20 '21, 07:26
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When my son informed us of his pot use Junior year in high school it was a turning point. We touch base with a psychologist about once a year, the same one my son frequents for his ADHD diagnosis. During that time, he was instrumental in helping us deal with the shock but then also to transition from parent to mentor at a time when I would have probably not been wise enough to consider it.
That switch (which we repeated with our daughter when she entered her senior year in HS) was monumental. It allowed us to shuffle off all the controlling, domineering, "helicopery" parent inclinations that we have and instead shift gears into an advisory role. It was both exceedingly positive and exceedingly hard as a parent. But we see the benefits. We keep a very hands off approach to our kids college lives. We take their cue for when they need our help and advice but even then we know not to do things for them, but to be there for them instead.
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