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In response to "Please, tell me how much of a terrible son I am." by Mop🧹

I also sometimes think I'm a terrible son for not accepting any real reconnection with my dad, and having left my mom's house nearly 11 years ago.

You should stick with the plans in place with your kids. Those plans have been made. They need to see full fruition. And put kind of bluntly? Your kids are more important than your parents.

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