Love Letters Response to Destined to Drink Alone:
Posted by
Diva (aka Diva)
Feb 16 '10, 08:54
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DTDA, you describe two problems in your letter. The first is your guy's refusal to drink. The second is his lack of interest in going out.
I have to wonder whether the drinking thing would bother you as much if he liked to go out and was more interested in seeing his friends. Lots of people manage to let loose without booze. Your guy just isn't interested in letting loose. Or, more accurately, he likes to let loose on the couch.
You're not being shallow. You're not overreacting. But you are trying to change him, and I'm not so sure he's changeable. You say that "things have been going great for the most part." How great?
If you want someone who will toast you as you do the town, this isn't the guy. Your options are to learn to socialize without him and join him on the couch when you're done, or to find someone more like-minded.
But please, don't assume this is about alcohol. It's about basic personality differences. If your guy was out at a restaurant giggling with you and declined to order a beer, you probably wouldn't even notice.
Not surprisingly, my advice is to talk to him about all of this. You're only half of the equation. Is he happy being with someone who likes to drink and go out? Does he believe that the good stuff about your relationship is good enough to make up for your differences? Find out.
Readers? Is this about alcohol? Is he being honest with her? Will her desires change as she gets older? Share.
� Meredith
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